Couple living together without proper marriage rites done on their union are commonly referred to as cohabiting. In cities cohabitation before marriage is on the rise. Many, have so many reasons why they choose to live with the opposite s3x under same roof doing married people stuff. No matter what the reasons are, co-habitation can’t be a substituted for marriage.
In an African Perspective, when you desire to live with your lover, you must do the needful put the necessary things in place – get married, whether it’s a civil wedding, Muslim/Christian wedding or our traditional wedding.
To the best of my knowledge cohabitation don’t End-well, its amount to nothing pleasant. Studies has shown that 33 percent of marriages that started from cohabitation end up in divorce. The disadvantages outweigh its advantages. A lot have been said about this form of relationship, but I will expose you (weddingtin readers) to the traumatic experiences associated with cohabitation. First, let’s talk about the cause of cohabitation in a typical Nigerian society.
Causes of Cohabitation
A young lady moves to the city from the countryside, with the hope of landing a job immediately she gets to the city, but on the contrary her hope got dashed, and frustrated with situation she finds herself. She jumps at the opportunity of living with any guy that comes around. Economic challenges have forced the young lady to live with this stranger without knowing him well, without paying her bride price and much more marrying her properly.
Lack of patience
Most times people are much more in a hurry to move in with their loved ones, thereby forgetting to do the needful – getting married legally. People are love starved, they jump into any available relationship, move in and start living under same roof in the name of love. This kind of union most times turn out sour.
I will say the Ladies are guilty of this, they are so much disturbed by their age, worry of been single when their friends have all gotten married. They rush into living with any man who throws a proposal of a relationship towards them.
Statistics has shown that cohabitation before marriage ends in a chaotic situation. trouble every day, the relationship most times is filled with quarrel, abuse and fight. Why go through this headache? My suggestion is simple, leave now – this relationship don’t worth the time and resources invested in them. Here are some trauma you may face in cohabitation before marriage
Been unmarried and cohabiting may attract causes or misfortune upon people who indulge in it. In Africa, marriage is regarded as a sacred institution, especially with the traditional institutions. When the wedding rites and bride-price is paid, parent or a minister blesses the union and declares it fruitful.
Therefore, when two individuals are cohabiting before marriage, it is believed that this may attract causes upon them and the relationship.
No Right over children or Properties
in a situation where a cohabiting relationship has produced child or children and eventually the man and the woman got separated or death occur. The man has no power to claim the children because traditionally he has not married the woman and the man stands to lose his children except he does the needful.
On the other hand, the woman has no right to lay hands on the man properties in an event of the man’s death. This is because the man did not marry her, the woman and the children may not gain anything from the man traditionally.
It is important for couples to be well prepared for the journey ahead, because relationship like this produces miscreants as parties involved are not ready (Financially and emotionally) to take proper care of the children brought up in such relationship.
I know most people will not agree to this, but am sorry the truth has to be told. PEACE!!